Holes To Fill: Nothing But Smoke and Mirrors
by Eridel
Summary: Sometimes, you realize you still have your whole life ahead of you, and you smile. Sometimes, you realize that you lost your whole life that was behind you, and you smile still. What else can you do? See first chapter for notes.
1. Notes

Summary, Warnings, Disclaimers, and Notes  
  
Ah, welcome! It's been....quite some time since I've written anything new here, but I'd like to get started again. And what better than with a Final Fantasy piece, right? I have to admit, my reasons for actually writing this story are pretty selfish.... I was annoyed at the lack of background they gave to the characters you create in the game, so I felt like writing my own people. And from there, their story almost wrote itself. I'm lying, of course. If it wrote itself, then I wouldn't be passing out from lack of sleep while trying to get this written out.  
Enough of my ramblings. A quick summary of this story would be.... Well, there isn't really a way to make a quick summary of this without belittling some major parts, so I think I'll just leave this part blank. Almost. Whatever it is, I'm hoping that it'll be a bit different from the average caravan tale. And it'll be long. Very long. I'm sure about that, at least.  
And there are going to be some differences from the game. Miasma doesn't kill immediately, it's truly like a poison that corrupts the body and breaks it down. Um.... I'm not really following the story in the game at all, maybe a few things will come into play, but I'm basically starting at the time where you begin the game, and creating my own stuff from there on. Characters from the game may be mentioned, but I will most likely have created a different story for them than what was given in the game. What else.... Um, Magicite is a little different, still casting and all that stuff, but in general, people don't let the Magicite pieces touch bare skin. Fire stones will burn, Blizzard stones will be extremely cold to the touch, Thunder stones will give a shock, etc. If I can think of anything else, I might add it later. Maybe not. You'll be able to figure it out, I'm sure.  
And on to the warnings. There are none really, at least for now, as you could most likely tell by the rating. It's probably going to go up eventually, but not right now. I'll warn you all ahead of time if it does, so don't worry about that. A last warning, though, is that there is going to be shounen-ai in this story, but again, not for a LONG while. Shounen-ai is homosexual relationships, and if that bugs you, then either read up till then and stop, or just don't read at all. Like with the rating, warning will come in plenty of time.  
Finally, the disclaimer. I'll write it just once here, instead of rewriting it onto all the following chapters, because I'm a very lazy person. So please don't sue. I have nothing of monetary value. At all. Anyway, I don't own Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles. I am making no money off of this story.  
Satisfied? Now on to the story.... 


	2. A Handful of Complaints

HOLES TO FILL

Part One: Nothing But Smoke And Mirrors

Chapter One: A Handful of Complaints

--Recommended Listening: Zenobia's Grave (A Champion Has Risen) from Ogre Battle (download it from )

**START.**

Strike. Noon.

"Very good. And if I move here...."

Strike. Dodge.

"Yes. And then...."

Strike. Slide.

"Ow!" Drey yelped, as the wooden sword struck his hand; and he dropped his own stick and drew his arm back quickly to cradle the bruised fingers to his chest. "Nnnn.... Kaj, that was mean!" he cried miserably, looking up with watery eyes through the screen of grayish-purple hair that slid over his forehead.

Kaj raised one slim eyebrow skeptically. Fourteen years, and Drey still tried to exploit Kaj's (theoretical) compassion. A chuckle threatened to break his stern countenance and he frowned harder. "You left yourself open," he said simply, shrugging his shoulders in nonchalance. See? It didn't work. Like always. Now stop trying. His own pale blue hair rustled quietly as it moved against his back. "What was I supposed to do?"

"You could have just pointed it out!" Drey answered, borderline violence tinting his voice and his green eyes flashing as he glared up at his friend, though the effect was somewhat (greatly) diminished by the childish pout that scrunched up his face. He thrust his injured hand towards Kaj, giving the taller boy a good view of his faintly red knuckles. "You didn't have to hit me!"

We're training in close combat.

Would an enemy pity you?

Kaj blinked and stared at the hand in front of him for a moment, a little startled at Drey's sudden ferocity. Surely he hadn't really hurt him; he avoided it at near any cost.... But Drey was still holding out his hand, almost expectantly. Kaj sighed then and reached out, taking a hold of Drey's fingers and pulling his arm closer to him as he leaned down and briefly brushed his lips across the bruised skin. Then he moved back, shaking his head in a suspiciously condescending manner.

Needless to say, that wasn't what Drey had been expecting.

Shocked, Drey just stood there, his arm still partially stretched out and his mouth still partially open, his face slack in the dazed expression of a fish suddenly held out of water and not quite sure how to react. "Ah...." he finally managed. "That...." He trailed off, though, as Kaj turned a glare of his own towards Drey.

He was annoyed.

"What was I supposed to do?" Kaj asked again, even his words tense. When was Drey going to grow up? And this wasn't the first time Drey had taken a slip-up to heart; recently they even seemed to be becoming a regular occurrence, and Kaj didn't know how much he could take without snapping and doing something rash. Honestly, it wasn't as if Kaj was deliberately trying to hurt him.

But still...

Calm down.

He was losing control over something so little. As the elder of the two, that was unacceptable. He settled for explaining himself. "According to you kids, kissing a wound is supposed to make it heal faster, or some such nonsense. You should know by now that I always do the reasonable thing."

Of course. He's -how- many years younger than you? And besides that...

'Alright, alright.'

'I'll give him a break.'

Leaning his makeshift sword over his shoulder he turned away and began to walk off. The lesson was over for the day. Sometimes he wondered why he even put up with Drey at all.

Because you promised.

Remember?

Someone had to.

"I'm not a kid! I'm almost 15!"

"Congratulations."

"-Kaj-!"

Kaj suppressed a groan at the whining note in Drey's voice and turned back to tell him to stop complaining, that it couldn't even be considered an injury, that Seamhen would laugh him out of the clinic, to stop acting like such a child.... And instead found himself staring down the barrel of a cannon. Metaphorically. Drey had already launched himself towards Kaj by the time the older boy was able to process what his eyes took in. In one instant, Kaj stared in mild surprise at the brown and purple shape coming towards him, blurred with speed, and in the next, he found himself lying on his back on the ground, a very smug (and rather heavy) Drey perched on his stomach. The younger boy smirked down at him, not even bothering to brush back the strands of hair that had come free of his bandana yet again. "You left yourself open," Drey said finally, mimicking Kaj's own words, and beaming with pride at being able to catch Kaj off his guard.

'It was a fluke.'

Keep telling yourself that.

Someone has to protect that ego of yours.

Kaj's eyes narrowed slightly, and a smirk of his own tugged at the corners of his lips. "Is that so?" he asked quietly, before his hands swooped up and caught Drey's waist, rolling the boy off to one side and tickling him mercilessly.

Finally, Kaj pulled back onto his heels, allowing himself a small smile as he stood, brushing grass and dirt from his clothes in a cursory gesture and keeping half his attention on his 'victim'. "Well then, I guess we're even."

Drey cracked one eye open and looked up at Kaj from where he still lay on the ground, his clothes rumpled and dirty (he was going to have to wash them sometime tonight now), and his face flushed from laughing so hard that he could hardly breathe. "Not...fair. You...cheated..." he said breathlessly between gasps for air.

Kaj rolled his eyes, and then raised his hands in a soothing gesture. "Alright then, say I was cheating," he replied carefully, not truly conceding that he had actually done any such thing, for that would have been the same as saying that he was in the wrong, which was absolutely _unacceptable_.... "Hypothetically, what could I have done to make up for it?"

"Another hour," Drey answered immediately, and then paused, propping himself up on one elbow, his eyes sparkling with suppressed laughter. "Hypothetically, of course."

"Of course."

Drey did laugh then, and collapsed back down, sprawling across the grass carelessly as he looked up and saw patches of blue sky through gaps in the miasma clouds. He smiled broadly and drew in a deep breath. After a moment, he spoke. "You know what, Kaj?" he said, closing his eyes as if he were going to sleep. "These are good memories."

The word 'now' hung in the air, unspoken.

Kaj looked down and felt a sudden jolt of nostalgia. Fourteen years, he thought again. Drey's whole life, and most of his own. Their families were so intertwined at this point that Kaj could hardly imagine what their lives would have been like if they –hadn't- grown up together.

Ah, but you had a chance to discover that, you know.

With an angry sigh, Kaj turned from that line of thought. His decision was already made. There was no need to think about it anymore.

Drey opened his eyes and tilted his head onto its side so he could see Kaj. "Hmmm? You say something Kaj?" he asked.

No, nothing.

But what I thought on the other hand....

"No, nothing," Kaj answered. He drew his fingers through his hair and walked over to Drey, leaning down a little and reaching out his hand. "Come on, you've already wasted five minutes now."

"Ah! Not fair!" Drey cried, grabbing Kaj's wrist to hoist himself up from the ground, and he began searching frantically for his wooden sword. Finally, with a triumphant, "Hah!" he spotted it nestled in the grass next to the lantern that held the crystal.

"I know, I know. I'm a horrible person. Now let go of my hand and pick up your weapon so we can continue."

"It's a stick!" More whining.

"Whatever. -Let go- of my hand."

Drey paused for an instant, the carefree smile on his face faltering for a fraction of a second, and then he stuck his tongue out in yet another childish display of rebellion as he stalked off to pick up his stick, a highly annoyed Kaj pulled behind him.

"Drey..."

Drey simply stopped walking, no warning, so that Kaj just barely kept from running into his back, and Drey stared at the dark green grass curling up around his sandals.

"You're not...not mad at me, are you Kaj?" His hand still gripped Kaj's wrist, his fingers tightening almost sporadically, as if they weren't entirely under his control any more.

Kaj frowned then, puzzled as always by Drey's rapidly changing moods. Why couldn't people be easy to predict?

Ah, but that would take all the fun out of life, wouldn't it?

You aren't -really- angry with him, are you?

Again, Kaj said nothing as he tried to sort out the thoughts in his head. Of course he was angry. A little bit, at least. He had the right to be irritated at Drey's whining, didn't he? Admittedly, Kaj might have been a little terse with him from time to time, but Drey never seemed to take it seriously. If he was worried about Kaj being angry with him, why didn't he bring it up earlier?

Because even at his age, he knows how you would react.

'When was Drey going to grow up?'

Sound familiar?

The sudden freedom of his hand brought Kaj back from his thoughts. Drey had released his wrist with a near silent chuckle; so quiet you could barely hear the self-deprecating tones that saturated the slight sound. But they were there. Drey shrugged sheepishly and looked back over his shoulder, all smiles again. "Yeah, I probably deserve it, right Kaj? You do tell me that I complain a lot. Maybe I should...listen more, or something."

Kaj didn't know what to say to that.

Good move.

Silence can be taken to mean anything.

Maybe it's more like: Good move in any situation but this one.

"Drey...." Kaj began quietly, grimacing as he struggled to think of something appropriate to say. "No, I'm.... It's not...."

It's not that hard.

Three simple words.

Drey shrugged again, laughed again, and wove one hand in a dismissive gesture. "Hey, no, seriously, it's fine. Don't worry about it, okay? I just gotta grow up a little. No problem." He kneeled in the grass next to the lantern and looped its thin cord around his wrist a few times, then reached over to pick up his wooden sword. "No problem at all, you know?" His voice was quieter that time. Then he stood, canting the stick over his shoulder as he turned back to Kaj. "I, I was just kidding about the whole extra hour thing. You've already wasted the whole morning on me, so you definitely don't owe me anything." He glanced down at his feet again, suddenly seeming as awkward as Kaj had. His dark blue bandana had lost all usefulness as it began to slide down over his forehead as well, pushing more hair into his eyes, but he didn't make any move to fix it. "Yeah, so....I guess we can head back now, if that's okay...." And he stepped forward, walking past Kaj without waiting for an answer, still keeping his head down.

You're an idiot; you know that?

Three words!

Kaj turned then, quickly, and his hand reached out to grip Drey's arm, almost cringing himself when he realized how tightly he was holding on. He made no move to loosen his grip, though, and waited until Drey looked back at him to speak. "I'm not mad," he said, quietly, like always. "Okay?"

"Kaj!"

Both boys' heads came up as the voice wafted across the fields. Kaj took a quick look back at Drey and let go of his arm before looking over Drey's head. "It's Dah Rin," he said as the blond ran towards them, and then frowned slightly. Dah Rin was a close friend of his, and had been for many years. And in that time, Kaj had almost never seen him so...frantic? By the time Dah Rin reached them, almost dropping the lantern he had brought with him, Kaj was growing anxious himself.

"Kaj," Dah Rin said finally, looking up at the other boy with more than restlessness and unease in his eyes. "...You have to the village." His own words were broken by his labored breathing, much like Drey's had been earlier, but there was something crucially different in his face that sent a strange chill through Kaj's body. "...It's Ciel."

'It's Ciel?'

What's wrong?

Kaj stared past Dah Rin at the dark roofs of Burniver that stood above the gently rolling hills and fields all around, and then snatched Dah Rin's lantern from him and began to run, not even hearing the shouts that followed him over his own heartbeat. His greyish-blue hair whipped around his head, so similar to the tall grass that lashed around his legs as he ran into the town, his head swiveling from side to side as he realized that he had no idea where to go now. His chest was being crushed; he could feel it, something dark and impossibly heavy coming at him from all sides, frozen teeth and claws ready to pull him apart.

"Kaj!" Then his mother was waving at him frantically from the doorway of the small pale building that served as a hospital, her thin face tense and drawn with worry.

Hospital?

'No.'

The doctor was standing behind his mother, looking over her shoulder placidly. At least, that was Kaj's guess. He had no idea what was going on behind that large, lumpy helmet. Seamhen was not just the only doctor in Burniver, he was also the only Yuke, and had lived in the clinic for longer than Kaj had been alive, a true worker of miracles. Kaj dropped the lantern uncaringly from his hand next to the building and walked inside, catching his mother in a brief embrace as he stared at Seamhen, the question silent on his tongue but voiced in his eyes. The doctor nodded, and then turned down the hallway in front of them. 'Too slow!' Kaj wanted to scream, as he followed after the Yuke. 'You're going to slow!' He was impatient, and was finding it more and more difficult to keep himself from running. A single, sobering thought restrained him, though. He wasn't completely sure which way he wanted to run. Part of him was screaming to push past his mother and the doctor and find Ciel. The other side, the coward part, he thought with a grimace, whispered incessantly to him to run as far away as he could.

He continued to walk.

Soon, (no, it had been years, a -lifetime-) Seamhen stopped in front of a door. A plain white door with the number seven painted above it, but nothing else to distinguish it from the others. It could have been the door to a morgue, or to heaven. It could have led to Kaj's own room. Then the Yuke opened the door and motioned for Kaj and his mother to go in. He reached out as they moved past him, though, and put his hand on Kaj's shoulder.

Oh, no, you don't need to warn me.

Hell waits.

Isn't that right, Doctor?

"I advise you not to get too close," the doctor cautioned in that mellifluous, sing-songy voice that all Yukes shared. "The poisoning could possibly affect you as well."

Poisoning?

As in....

And for an instant, Kaj hesitated at the door, wavering between the black, horrible worry for Ciel, and a sudden, almost overwhelming concern for his own safety. The instant passed, though, as quickly as it had come upon him, leaving in its wake a searing disgust for his own superficial thoughts, and he pushed past the doctor and into the small room.

He didn't care about poison.

This was his little sister, after all.

What struck him first were the other people in the room. Turning his head to one side, he saw his parents standing together against one pale wall, as if they were actually taking the doctor's words seriously. His mother cried softly into his father's arm, while his father was staring adamantly at the small bed backed into the far corner. At the little girl wrapped loosely in blankets, her dark green hair spread carelessly across the pillow, stark in comparison with her pale, too pale, skin. Then Kaj was at her side, kneeling down and carefully taking her hand in his, cringing inside at how thin and fragile her fingers felt.

Oh, you poor boy.

Have you never touched Death before?

Kaj's eyes were focused on Ciel's face.

Where was her smile? Her laughter? Her sharp eyes glinting with excitement at the latest tales from the caravans.... If it weren't for the shallow breaths rattling in her limp form, and the occasional convulsive tightening of her hand, Kaj might've thought....

But no.

Ciel was alive. Of course she was. His little sister had always been strong; she would have never let anything tie her down like this.

And now he was talking about her in the past tense.

With a great effort, Kaj forced his voice to retain some semblance of calm as he looked over his shoulder at the Yuke still standing in the doorway. "What happened?" he asked quietly, feeling strangely lightheaded from the blood racing through his body at multiples of its normal speed.

The doctor stared back at Kaj levelly. "Miasma poisoning," he replied softly, with only the slightest hesitation. Kaj could hear the frown in his voice. "Usually, it takes at least forty minutes for the body to be corrupted this far, but at her age, and taking into consideration the fact that she was already ill...." A pause. The doctor shook his head once. Then, "Twenty minutes, maybe less. She would have experienced symptoms almost immediately, but she most likely believed that they were caused by her fever."

Kaj didn't respond. Moments crawled by, marked by the relentless ticking of the wooden clock hanging on the wall. The sound hurt; like hammer strokes on the bedposts.

Nails in the coffin, boy.

Watch as we seal her away.

His mind was spinning, tearing away from his hard-won control, and he had to all but force his next question out through gritted teeth. "Is there any way to tell how she was exposed to the miasma?"

Another pause. The doctor was tense; no helmet could hide that. He had seen it countless times; the temporary loss of self-control brought about by such stressful circumstances could quickly lead to anger and violence. Hidden behind metal, Seamhen could have smiled. So much like his father, this young Selkie. Choosing his words carefully, he continued. "She must have left the confines of Burniver without the protection of a crystal."

"Impossible."

Kaj's reply hung in the air, defiant. "She is not an infant; she is nearly thirteen. She would never do something so foolish." He glanced over at his parents still huddled against the far wall, his eyes sharp with contempt. "And you!" he continued, more forcefully than before. "This is your -daughter-! How can you act as if she's nothing more than a monster just because she's ill? I don't understand how...you people think." Kaj's voice cracked once. He turned back to the small white bed, his shoulders hunched slightly.

Yes, that's right.

Blame them.

Blame those that have to watch their own children suffer.

Is that not a punishment itself?

"Kaj," his mother said after a moment, stepping forward once, then twice, her arm reaching out for her son. "Please...."

A cry from the hallway cut her off.

"Let me go! I want to see her! Ciel! Where are you?"

**BREAK.**

Drey watched as Kaj ran off towards the village, and then turned back to Dah Rin with barely a pause. Concern and impatience warred in his eyes. "What happened to Ciel?" he asked simply. 'No lies,' he thought. 'I don't want them.'

Dah Rin looked back at him, and then turned away, gesturing for Drey to follow as he began to head back towards Burniver. "She's sick," he answered finally, and then held up one hand to forestall Drey's questioning. "I don't know anything more about it; their mother ran up to me, asking me to find Kaj and bring him to the hospital, that Ciel was sick. Other than that...." Dah Rin shrugged helplessly.

Drey nodded absently, but his steps quickened. How he wanted to run the rest of the way, tear across the fields like Kaj had done. His eyes slid to the side, to Dah Rin. The older boy's steps were as short and rushed as his own, and Dah Rin's jaw was clenched tight. He wanted to run as well. "How is Maekyl?" Drey asked quietly.

Dah Rin walked a little faster; his eyes narrowed a little more.

"Maekyl is fine."

Drey remained silent.

"Her little sister is sick, too."

They began to run.

**BREAK.**

It took far longer than Drey had hoped to reach the village, and then from there to the hospital. The pale, one story building now seemed to loom above him as Drey moved forward, the door a great cavernous mouth or a tunnel that led to a tomb.

Drey preferred to think of it as nothing but a door.

It didn't help much.

And it was then that he noticed that Dah Rin had fallen back a few steps; his arms were pressed against his sides, and his hands pulled into loose fists. The blond hair that hung to the middle of his back, bound though it was, swayed in the rising wind. That was probably Dah Rin's most distinguishing feature: Selkies tended to leave their hair unbound; even Kaj did so. Drey himself wore a bandana wrapped around the top of his head to keep stray strands from falling in front of his eyes, though with little success.

Dah Rin's voice interrupted his thoughts and he came back to himself with a start.

"Ah.... Drey, I...." And Dah Rin paused, unsure of how to continue.

What was it with everyone being unable to speak?

Drey smiled warmly then, and he waved his hand in a dismissive gesture. "Don't worry about it. I'll tell her you stopped by." Inside, Drey cringed, and he felt a sudden urge to strike himself. How had he forgotten? "I'll let you know what's been going on, okay?"

Dah Rin relaxed visibly and let out a quiet breath. "Thanks, Drey," he said. Then he laughed, a weak, forced sound as he scrubbed his hand through his hair, retying the ends together with a piece of string. "You know how it is, my mother wanted me to make sure the cattle were brought in before evening and...." He glanced up at the sky; the sun was just past its zenith. "...and it'll take me a while to...do that." He stared at his feet, not even bothering to look back at Drey. "So, thanks. I'll see you later." His eyes still averted, Dah Rin waved goodbye and near ran to his house.

It was only after several minutes that Drey was able to walk into the hospital himself.

**BREAK.**

Inside, the building was much less threatening. Almost comfortable. Well, maybe not almost. Long windows covered the front of the building, now behind him, throwing slanted bars of light across the floor. Drey's shadow was stretched out in front of him, elongating and exaggerating his figure into a ridiculous form, reminding him of the jesters that would occasionally visit Burniver if the weather was nice. He walked forward a few steps, glancing at the closed doors around him apprehensively, somewhat hesitant to continue down the hallway in front of him. Low mutters came from somewhere off to his side, and as he came to the decision to ask whoever was speaking for help, an unmistakably familiar voice rose above the mumbling. Drey could hear the anger in it clearly. "Kaj..." Drey said quietly, turning back to the hallway. Drey could still hear him, and began to follow it, and even after Kaj's voice had stopped, he could still guess where to go.

Then a door behind him was flung open, striking the wall violently with a loud crack, the harsh sound echoing through the hallway. Drey moved back a step in surprise, staring at the young girl trying to make her way out through the doorway, fighting against the woman that kept a tight grip on the girl's wrist.

"Aya Noh, what are you doing?!" the older girl asked tersely, trying, with equal success, to pull the younger one back into the room. "Get back in here! Doctor Seamhen told you to stay in bed for the rest of the day, no exceptions!"

They were sisters, Drey knew. The elder of the two was Maekyl, the one Drey had promised to talk to. But...what was he supposed to say? He couldn't very well interrupt, it wasn't his place, but he had promised...He was either a coward or an interfering little kid. He still stung from talking with Kaj. He was -not- a kid!

So he did nothing.

"Let me go!" Aya Noh cried, her pale purple hair stringy and limp as it fell over her forehead. She pulled at her sister's grip once more, her bare feet scrabbling for a better hold on the horribly smooth floor, but she still couldn't free herself. Biting her lower lip, she drew her other arm back, and turned suddenly, striking Maekyl across the cheek with one cruel movement. "I want to see her!"

Maekyl stumbled back at the force of the blow, releasing her hold on Aya Noh's arm as she tried to catch herself on the doorframe. Aya Noh fell forward across the hallway, and leaned heavily against the far wall, one hand covering her mouth in a useless attempt to stifle a sudden, violent fit of coughing.

And still Drey didn't move.

What would he have done?

Aya Noh pushed herself away from the wall forcefully, pointedly not looking at her sister as she began to make her way down the hallway. "Ciel!" she yelled out, looking from side to side at all the closed doors just like Drey himself had done. "Where are you?"

She had almost reached where Drey stood when Maekyl called out to her once more. "Aya Noh! Wait!" Her voice was different from a moment ago, Drey noticed. It was no longer demanding; there was a near pleading note in her words now. Maybe that was why Aya Noh turned back to her.

And neither spoke.

Then Maekyl laughed. Unlike Dah Rin's that had been forced and painful to listen to, Maekyl's laugh was almost light-hearted. She rubbed her cheek absentmindedly with a small smile on her face, as she looked over at her little sister. "As stubborn as always, aren't you.

"It's the fourth door on the left. Look for the number seven."

Drey could see a matching smile spread over Aya Noh's face for a moment, and then she ran past him towards the fourth door on the left.

It was then that Maekyl finally noticed Drey standing there.

Her cheeks turned red, and Drey knew that she was embarrassed. Family matters were kept within the family. That was how it was. Drey felt awkward as well, having intruded on something like that, and he wanted nothing more than to run after Aya Noh and find Kaj and Ciel. But he had promised Dah Rin. That took precedence. "Maekyl?" he began, forcing himself to sound calmer than he truly was. "Dah Rin asked me to let you know that he can't stop by right now, and that he says sorry, but he'll talk to you later." He winced. Trying to explain things made them sound worse. It was times like this that he wished he had Kaj's eloquence.

Maekyl stared at him for a moment before nodding. "Alright," she responded. "Thanks, Drey." She frowned a little, and tilted her head to one side, wondering. "Did he say...why he couldn't come in?"

Drey froze. "Um...." He struggled for an explanation. What had Dah Rin said? "His mother wanted him to take care of the cows," he said quickly, trying to sound as convincing as possible. Which was no easy task.

It came as no surprise that Maekyl didn't look as if she believed him. Drey wished he could have said something more comforting.

Slowly, Maekyl raised one hand to her cheek again, and looked down at her feet. "I don't...fight with her like that all the time," she said quietly, as if she were trying to convince someone of that. Drey began to speak, but she continued. "I...I just didn't want...her to know...."

Drey stared at her for a whole minute, his eyes slowly widening. Then he turned and ran towards the fourth door on the left.

Maekyl wanted to cry.

**BREAK.**

The voice was familiar.

Kaj looked up from Ciel's bedside, unsurprised when Aya Noh ran into the doorway. It made sense, he thought, that she would be here. Aya Noh and Ciel spent as much time together as Drey and Kaj did; they might as well have been sisters. No, it made sense that she would be here as well.

"Ciel!" Aya Noh said quietly, oblivious to the tired sigh from the doctor and the incredulous stare from Kaj as she saw the other girl lying motionless on the hospital bed. For an instant, she couldn't move, she could have sworn that she had been Stopped, for all that she could breathe. Was this why Maekyl hadn't wanted her to leave the room? Then she had rushed forward, near falling to her knees at Ciel's side, and she looked at her friend's face closely, her eyes searching the features anxiously. Looking over her shoulder, she glanced up at Kaj, unable to ask what she most wanted to know.

Kaj was shocked by the look of stark horror on the young girl's face. What could he say to that? Why would someone feel like that at all?

'If something were to happen to Drey, would –I- look like that?'

Would you like to find out?

"She's fine," Kaj said quickly, realizing almost immediately that he had said it not only for Aya Noh's benefit, but also for his own. He needed to hear the words aloud, even if they were from his own mouth. Even if they weren't true.

Aya Noh looked back at Ciel, at her thin arm spread out on the blanket, and had to bite her lip again to keep from crying aloud. Instead, she reached out suddenly and latched onto Kaj and Ciel together, hunching over her arms. "Oh Ciel, I'm so sorry!" She felt Kaj's hand tense under her own, and she looked back at him, her eyes shining suspiciously. "I didn't know this would happen! I knew that she had been sick, but she said that she was fine now! Kaj, I'm sorry! We were just playing in my yard...." Her face began to tense up, and her teeth sank into her lip. "And then...she was coughing, and wouldn't stop, and then I started coughing too, and she fell down and didn't get up....I'm so sorry!" And she started to cry. Her hands came up to her face, trying to hide behind her fingers, pressing her fists against her eyes to stop the treacherous tears.

Kaj just stared, completely at a loss for what to do.

'Stop crying!'

'I don't know what to do with that!'

He reached out his arm slowly, and rested his hand on her small, quaking shoulder, in an attempt to comfort the girl. He almost jerked back when Aya Noh clutched at his wrist desperately, still crying. Apologies tumbled from her mouth, mostly jumbled and incoherent amongst the sobs.

Kaj suddenly glared at the doctor and his parents. His eyes screamed, 'Look at her! Look what you've done!'

Then he saw Drey standing in the doorway, looking at him carefully, as if he was worried that Kaj was still angry with him.

Kaj had to look away. Wetness pricked at his eyes and he squeezed them shut. No more tears! He wanted to scream. He opened his eyes and stared at Ciel's face instead.

At least Ciel wasn't crying. It might have killed him.

**BREAK.**

After a half an hour or so, Aya Noh had quite literally cried herself to sleep, and Drey had called Maekyl in to carry her back to her own room. Then the doctor pulled Kaj out into the hallway to speak with him alone. Drey stayed with Ciel.

"The plain truth," Seamhen said in answer to Kaj's question, "is that there is very little hope that Ciel will ever be able to recover. Like I said earlier, she was already weak when exposed to the miasma, and she's so young! I have already done everything I can. Magicite can only do so much; it does not work miracles, however much we may pray."

Kaj couldn't even nod.

The Yuke continued when Kaj remained silent. "And she isn't the only person to be admitted today because of miasma poisoning. As you have probably guessed by now, Aya Noh was affected as well, but not nearly as severely, and she has already begun to recover."

Kaj spoke then. "Seamhen," he said quietly. "Aya Noh said that they were playing in her yard when Ciel began coughing." The doctor nodded, agreeing. "But that means that Ciel wasn't exposed to miasma by leaving Burniver. If you're absolutely positive that miasma is what has caused her condition...." Here he looked up at Seamhen, and waited for him to nod before continuing. "...then they must have been exposed to it while in Aya Noh's yard."

Another nod.

If Kaj had been paying attention, he might have been annoyed.

As it was, he was too bewildered by his own conclusions to be angry at all. His mouth opened once, than twice as he tried to find a way to put what he was thinking into words.

Seamhen did it for him. "The miasma has begun to infiltrate Burniver," he said plainly. Kaj stared up at him with a mix of confusion and dread, and he spoke again. "There will be more who fall ill from miasma poisoning before the day is out if they are not warned. But, it may also cause a panic if not handled correctly. And a panic..." Here he looked directly at Kaj. "...is exactly what is not needed."

And yet another nod as Kaj agreed. The reasons for his sister and Aya Noh's sudden hospitalization would be kept quiet until a plan had been created. "Would you let the town elder know that I must speak with him immediately?" the doctor asked.

"Of course. But...

"I have one more question.

"Was there really any chance of the miasma poisoning affecting others in the room?" I'm not worried; I just want to know.

You know what?

I believe you.

Seamhen didn't answer for a moment, and then he shook his head. "No, not at all."

Kaj turned to leave, when the Yuke put his hand on Kaj's shoulder again. "Kaj," he said softly, his smooth voice pained. "I'm so sorry."

'I've heard that too many times already.'

What else could he say to you?

Short of lying, of course.

Kaj bowed to the doctor, and then turned and walked out of the hospital, not once looking back.

**END.**

There you are, the first chapter! It took quite some time to work it into something I was happy with, so I'm hoping that it goes over well. Please let me know what you thought. praise, problems, suggestions, I'll take it all. I'm eternally grateful to everyone who took the time to read this through; you guys are priceless! Ja!


	3. A Night Like This

Notes: I got a few questions from friends about the Yuke doctor's name. 'Seamhen' is pronounced, 'Shah-min'. Sorry for any confusion, and for the long wait before I got this out. I've been having some computer trouble lately, but it's been resolved finally. Yay!! And a shout-out to Matt; you've already noticed 'Burniver'...Sorry! Just a good name!!

And a huge thanks to 'Aznboy714', 'Lee Jun-Fan', 'and SwordofBlackRoses' for your kind reviews!! You're wonderful!!

Recommended Listening: 'Holding On' by VNV Nation

Chapter Two: A Night Like This

**START.**

"Kaj!"

Drey caught up with him outside. Kaj looked over his shoulder as the other boy ran up to him; and he tried to smile. He had a feeling that it wasn't as convincing as he had wanted it to be. "Hey," he answered, a little quieter than usual. The wind had picked up, and he had to smooth his hair back out of his face or risk being unable to see the buildings around him.

Yeah, you really have to watch out for those houses.

They like to sneak up on you.

"Kaj," Drey began, but Kaj already knew what he was going to say. "I'm so sor...." He didn't get a chance to finish as Kaj clamped a hand over Drey's mouth.

"_Don't_!" Kaj almost whispered, his voice raw, and Drey fell into a surprised silence. In four years, Drey had only once seen him so openly shaken. It was the first day they met; Drey had woken up on a bed in the clinic, and Kaj was sitting by his side. He looked like he was going to cry then. It had scared Drey four years ago, and now was no different. Kaj pulled back after a moment, not bothering to shake the strands of hair from his eyes this time as he turned away. "It's not your fault," he continued, and his voice was more or less steady again. "So, just don't worry about it."

Drey's mouth twisted down in a scowl. "You can't really," he said after a minute, his arms akimbo in defiance, "ask that of me, you know? I thought that after four years, our friendship meant more than that. Geez, I mean, look at you! You're all messed up because of this, and you expect me –not- to worry about it? You're a real idiot sometimes!"

Obviously.

What have I been telling you?

Kaj turned back to Drey then, and his eyes looked strangely tried. Sort of worn out. "I am, aren't I?" he responded, a dull scorn spiking his words that made Drey regret what he had said. "A real idiot." His shoulders lifted and fell dejectedly, and he shook his head. His mouth opened again, but nothing came out, and he shut it quickly, his teeth clicking together with a sharp sound.

'Stop it!' Drey wanted to shout. 'Killing yourself for her won't help anyone! Her least of all....' Instead he shook his head violently. "I didn't mean it; you're not an idiot. And besides," he paused for an instant, just a second of hesitation. "I was the one who kept you out of Burniver all morning. Away from Ciel."

Well, at least Kaj stopped moping.

His face hardened, and the self-hatred seemed to almost drain from his eyes, replaced with nothing, and Drey was suddenly afraid that Kaj would strike him. He nearly took a step back, but that would have defeated the whole point of saying that he was to blame. So he stood where he was, determined to force Kaj to give up responsibility. 'Hit me, then,' he thought. 'If it'll make you feel better.'

But Kaj didn't even raise a hand. He just stared down at Drey for a long while, silent. Then he spoke, and a strange sort of vehemence was in his words. "I told you it wasn't your fault. Why won't you listen to me?" 'Like you used to.'

Ah, but to him, 'like you used to' is different than it is to you.

Drey couldn't find anything to say to that. So he settled for nodding his head slowly, his eyes on his feet.

Kaj sighed. That wasn't what he wanted. Why couldn't he make others understand what he meant? It was frustrating. He stepped forward and set his hand on Drey's shoulder like he had done to Aya Noh just recently. He hoped that it wouldn't cause Drey to dissolve into tears as well. Then he tipped his head to one side, considering. "I'm not mad at you, you do realize that?" he said finally, quiet again. It was strange, but Drey often seemed to need reassurance that others weren't angry with him, and his self-esteem could trickle down to less than nothing in an instant. Unsettling. Kaj had learned after the first breakdown that he needed to be careful. "I wasn't angry this morning, and I'm not angry now, okay?"

Now what was so hard about saying that earlier?

Silence again, and Kaj began to worry if he had done something wrong. Then Drey looked up at him, a smile plastered across his face. "I know," he answered, cheerfully. Like just moments ago he -hadn't- been half-afraid that Kaj was going to hit him. Like just an hour ago, he -hadn't- been worried that Kaj was angry with him. "Deep down, you're a real softie at heart."

See?

Should've said it earlier; he wouldn't have been so anxious.

But Kaj wasn't so sure. Drey's eyes shone suspiciously, and his voice lacked a certain energy that it usually had. All in an instant, he felt a sudden stab of hurt slice through him; hurt that Drey still, for some reason or another, wouldn't talk to him about what was bothering him. On an impulse, he said, "You trust me, right?" And then wished he hadn't said anything at all. 'You trust me, right?' It just sounded so...weak. As if he was as desperate for proof that he wasn't a complete bastard as Drey had been. But Drey was still a child, still innocent (relatively), still naïve (well, that depends). Drey was allowed to be unsure from time to time. 'Me on the other hand....'

Yes, of course.

It's always about –you- isn't it.

"Of course I trust you," came the answer, and this time there was no hesitation. A pout scrunched up his face and Drey glowered at Kaj. "Unless of course you've got some deep dark secret that you've been keeping from me over the years." But the accusation was light-hearted, with no malice whatsoever behind the words.

Which is exactly why Kaj froze up.

And that, in retrospect, was probably the worst possible thing to do in a situation like that. At least Kaj had always been quick wit h his tongue and he moved right along, not quite meeting Drey's eyes and instead focusing on the blue piece of cloth slipping down over one of his ears. Not the most prudent course of action to take by a long shot, but you have to take what you can get, or give, or something like that. "Do you want to stay at my house? We still have an extra bed available...." The same question he had asked every day for the past four years.

Good save.

Slip back into the old routine.

But can't you be a little more creative for once?

How about: You're not spending another night in the squalid hellhole that Clavatian hotel owner calls a room. Now pack your bags, 'cause you're staying with me whether you like it or not.

If Drey had noticed Kaj's (pathetic) attempt at a diversion, he didn't say anything about it. He just shook his head, still grinning. "No, I'm okay. Besides..." His voice lowered a little, and he leaned forward, almost conspiratorially. "I don't really think your mom would like it very much if I lived with you guys."

'My mother...? What has she been saying?' "I don't care whether she likes it or not," Kaj said suddenly, with more force than was strictly necessary. In fact, he hadn't meant to say anything like that at all. He frowned and tried to reconcile his outburst with something a bit more subdued. "I mean; I'm sure she doesn't really care either way, so, that's not a problem..." He trailed off, and then shrugged, giving up the idea of salvaging any of his last few lines.

Drey stared at him again, obviously thinking. Kaj could practically see the thoughts wandering around in his eyes. Then Drey smiled, in a near consoling way. "You're angry at them," he said finally, after a long moment.

How does he _do_ that?

Kaj rested one hand on his hip and looked somewhere off to the side, his way of conceding that Drey was right. And Drey, in his wisdom, didn't ask why. He probably already knew; Kaj wouldn't be surprised. The kid was surprisingly perceptive for someone his age.

"You know," Drey said suddenly, his voice soft and if Kaj listened hard enough he could hear the emptiness there that almost killed him. "You know, you should really try to get along with them, your parents I mean." As if he might not have been clear enough at first. "I'm not saying you're –not- trying, of course!" he continued quickly, waving his hands frantically. "It's just...." And his voice was back down again, quieter this time. ".... They're important, I guess. So you shouldn't get angry at them so easily or, take them for granted or anything...."

And at that, words failed. Kaj just looked down at Drey, completely at a loss for what to say. He found himself wondering when speech had become so wholly inadequate. Then, abruptly, Drey was all smiles again.

"Ah, sorry," Drey continued, resting one hand on the back of his head sheepishly. "I don't know when to quit." Kaj was still trying to work out something to say so Drey kept speaking, lively as always. "But anyway, I was thinking that you're probably gonna wanna spend time with Ciel, so you don't have to train with me tomorrow. It's not that important, and what's a few days off anyway?" He shrugged as if to emphasize that it wasn't a big deal, an Kaj didn't believe him for a second. An exasperated sigh slipped past Kaj's lips. His day was already bad enough as it was without him having to deal with Drey's erratic behavior.

So Kaj just shook his head resolutely. "No, it obviously _is_ important, otherwise neither of us would have stuck with it for this long already, and a few days off can make a big difference in the body's ability to remember movements. Lessons will continue tomorrow morning as usual." He raised one slim eyebrow when Drey tried half-heartedly to break in and easily overrode over the younger boy's objections. "I will have plenty of time to be with Ciel. A few hours a day will not make a difference."

'And I'll need the distraction....'

"If you're sure it's okay," Drey conceded, but unsurprisingly, he didn't sound too disappointed, even though he was obviously trying. "Then, I guess that I'll head back to the inn; May will probably have some chores for me to work on." May was the wife of the owner of the inn where Drey was staying, and one of the three Clavats in Burniver. She also shared responsibility with her husband for the building, and had worked out with Drey that to pay for his room he would help out around the inn when necessary. Which, in general, was a very good deal. But Kaj still didn't think that Drey should have to live alone like that at his age. Even if rooms surrounded him with other people, it just wasn't right.

"Okay," Kaj responded automatically, then wanted to kick himself for it. Even to his own ears it sounded like he couldn't care less where Drey was going.

See?

If you had asked differently earlier, at least you would have gotten a laugh.

Then Drey was turning away, waving back at Kaj over his shoulder. "Okay," Kaj said again, his own arm rising subconsciously to wave back.

Drey turned to look at Kaj but continued to walk, now backwards, and he finally retied his bandana about his head. "I'll see you tomorrow!" he yelled to Kaj, then spun back and began to jog.

"Okay." A part of him whispered that he had to come up with something different soon, or he'd really seem past it. After a few moments, Kaj decided to continue on; he still had to speak with the town elder anyway, send him to Seamhen so that he could learn of this problem that was engulfing his town. And for an moment, sparks of anger flared up in him, -irrational- anger, but anger all the same. Of all people, why did –his- sister have to go through this? How horribly, pathetically, cliché that such a young girl had been made the harbinger of this village. And then the crystal was in front of him, thrusting up towards the hidden sky as if it had grown from the earth itself, a strangely disconcerting reminder that the world around them was a deadly place, and all that held it back was this stone.

'It's sure doing a hell of a job, isn't it?'

Is that...bitterness?

Without that crystal, so many more would be dead.

Kaj's steps carried him forward to the base of the gem and he almost drew back his hand to strike at it; perhaps it would make him feel better. Perhaps it would appease that furious part of him that wanted nothing more than to destroy whatever was responsible for making the first crack in his world. Instead he slumped forward, his arms reaching out instinctively to support him against the glowing crystal, and he felt warmth seep into his fingers, as if he had laid them against living skin. His head felt like it was spinning, and he had to screw his eyes shut against wave after wave of dizziness that were trying to pull him down. What had happened to his life! He was a good person, as were Dah Rin, and Maekyl, Ciel, Aya Noh and Drey.... None of them deserved any of this. The world had gone mad, surely that must be it. The world had gone mad, and now the innocent must suffer because of it.

And then it was all too much, and Kaj's knees buckled. He slid to the ground, turning to lean his back against the smooth side of the crystal; he tilted his head back and closed his eyes, a sudden sense of exhaustion sweeping through him. Dimly, he could feel the steady pulse of the crystal behind him pervading his mind as the natural magic of the gem swirled in consistent, lazy movements; so reminiscent of a heartbeat. And when sleep finally came upon him, Kaj's mind was thankfully empty, and he gave in to slumber's gentle nagging without hesitation.

**BREAK.**

Evening was already beginning to slip its long shadows over Burniver by the time that Kaj finally opened his eyes. Covering a yawn with one hand, he blinked a few times to clear his vision of the gentle blurring that always developed after sleeping, and then he pushed himself to his feet. He reached his arms over his head, stretching his body taut with an almost feline grace, before absently brushing his hands over his clothes to dislodge whatever dirt may still have clung to him. He ran his fingers through his hair, combing out the few knots before they could become painful. He looked up at the shadowy sky and wondered if Drey would be having dinner with he and his family again tonight. Perhaps they could help Ciel with her alchemy work; Seamhen's lessons were notoriously complicated.

Kaj blinked once more.

It was only after his chest began to burn that he realized he had been holding his breath.

'Idiot.'

Then he was running, stumbling over his own feet in his hurry to reach the town elder's home. How long had it been since he had fallen asleep? Several hours? More? Sliding precariously to a stop in front of a trim, white gate, he didn't waste time trying to work open the latch (which, in his half-conscious state, would have been much more trouble than it was worth), deciding instead to grip the top of the fence and leap over. He rushed up to the door, then, and began rapping on the painted wood. After a minute or so, muffled cries of "Alright, alright, I'm coming already!" made themselves heard, and then a tall Selkie pulled the door open, a look of irritation almost disappearing from his face. "Oh, it's you, Kaj! How are you?"

For an instant, Kaj caught himself staring. He didn't think he was ever going to get used to this man being the new town elder. Teryl Loh was barely twice Kaj's own age; the title 'town elder' didn't even seem to fit anymore!

Curbing his thoughts before they went too completely off target, he focused on his message. "Seamhen wishes to speak with you," he said quietly, keeping his voice steady. His jaw was held tight; Kaj wasn't sure he could quite trust himself not to blurt out what was on his mind.

Teryl Loh frowned slightly, just a small turn down at the corners of his lips. "Ah, but my family and I have just sat down for dinner...." Then his smile returned suddenly, and his eyes lit up with an idea. "I know! Why don't you join us for something to eat, first. What do you think?"

In that moment, Kaj wanted so much to hate the man in front of him. How could he think about food when Ciel lay sick and this town, _his_ town, was in danger! It would be so easy for Kaj to believe that Teryl Loh was just trying to curry favor with him and others.

Yes, it –would- be so easy to believe that, but you know it's not true.

Honestly, he's so much like Drey, wearing his emotions on his sleeve for all the world to see....

But that doesn't matter; what are you waiting for!

"No, it's important. You must speak with Seamhen immediately." Kaj's voice was still quiet, but he bit off each word with a fierce intensity that made Teryl Loh frown again and look closer at him. "Listen, you must come! I have already wasted so much time...." Kaj looked over the town elder's shoulder, glancing apprehensively at the woman that had drawn near, his eyes worried.

At that, the cheerfulness seemed to visibly drain from Teryl Loh's face, starting with his eyes, and finally making its way down until even his smile faded. Then he turned halfway from Kaj to his wife who stood a few meters from them, her hands nervously linked together. "Ira," Teryl Loh said softly, and Kaj could hear the determination in his voice. "I'm going to speak with Dr. Seamhen; I'm sorry to interrupt dinner."

The woman shook her head gently as if to say an apology wasn't necessary. "You must do what you must do; you have responsibilities to hold up to." A comforting smile. "We will wait."

"Thank you."

Teryl Loh bowed his head and backed up the few steps needed to pass the doorway. He looked to Kaj again as he shut the door behind him. "Alright," he said finally, glancing across the large open ground, past the faintly glistening crystal, to the clinic. "I suppose that it must be very important, if Dr. Seamhen would call me to him." His voice lowered, he almost seemed to be talking to himself. He began to walk forward then, and Kaj kept up at his side.

"You are the town elder, the leader now," Kaj replied. There was bitterness in his words. "Matters like this are –supposed- to come to you."

Teryl Loh stared over at Kaj for a long while but said nothing, and the two passed the rest of the way to the clinic in silence. Seamhen was waiting for them at the door, and Kaj suddenly felt uncomfortable as he wondered how long the Yuke had been waiting. But as Seamhen led Teryl Loh up the stairs into the clinic, he glanced down at Kaj and his posture seemed to soften; he could have been smiling. "Go home and rest, Kaj," he said, quietly, and Kaj had a strange feeling that only he could hear it. "Tonight will be a hard night." And with that, the doctor and the town elder disappeared into the building and the door closed behind them.

For several moments, Kaj stared at the silent hospital before him, and then he turned and went home.

**BREAK.**

Nothing seemed right as Kaj walked into the house he shared with his parents and younger sister. It was as if every aspect of his life that had been so normal was now just a little bit off. It almost made his skin crawl. But he toed off his sandals inside the front door like always, determined not to let it get to him. Even when he made his way into the kitchen and saw no dinner, just his parents sitting at the table, opposite each other, staring at their hands, he kept a straight face. Even when he wanted to join them, he only bowed slightly (as if they could see him). "Good evening," he said quietly. Not that he really meant it. Not that he really expected much of a reaction. It was just that he said it every evening. So of course he didn't expect his mother to bolt up from her seat and wrap her arms around his neck, her body racking with muffled sobs. His father just lifted his head, staring at Kaj as if he had never seen him before.

"You are allowed to mourn, Kaj," he said gently.

Kaj's eyes narrowed. "I have not given up hope, -father-. There is no reason for me to mourn."

"Ah."

A few minutes later, "Your mother and I are considering moving out of Burniver."

".... What?"

His father stood then, taking a step forward as he lifted his arms in a helpless gesture. "I hate to think of leaving our home and our friends, but if this place is no longer safe.... What else can we do?" When Kaj did nothing but stare blankly at him, he continued. "If.... If Ciel pulls out of this we plan on leaving as soon as she is well enough to travel. I doubt it will be a permanent move, though. If whatever is going wrong here is fixed, then we'll move back. Kaj, please, at least listen...."

But Kaj was already shaking his head and backing out of his mother's arms. Anger surged through him again, and he glared furiously at his parents. "You would even –think- of abandoning our home over something you don't understand?" His mouth curled in distaste. "You say that you hate the thought of leaving your friends, then did you decide to bring them with us as well?"

"Ah, there will barely be room in the wagon for ourselves and our things...."

"So you would leave them here?!" Kaj cried, and his mother flinched. "In a place that you yourself believe is no longer safe? What about Drey; would you condemn him to suffer as well?"

"You would have us suffer along with them!" his mother said finally, her voice shrill and pained. Her eyes were shut tight and her hands had curled into fists. "We have very few choices here."

Kaj didn't answer; he only looked from one parent to the other, his scowl deepening. "Cowards," he spat, and walked out of the house, stepping into his sandals as he passed out of the doorway. For the second time that day he found himself ignoring his mother and father calling after him. On a whim, or perhaps a hope, he paused outside of the house, and waited. When after a moment, neither came out after him, he sighed. A safe way to release frustrations. And he walked away.

Where are you going?

Without stopping, Kaj shrugged. Where _was_ he going? Ah, but it didn't really matter. Perhaps he should find Dah Rin; after all, he was sure that Maekyl was probably having a difficult time with her sister. Where would Dah Rin be, then? Most likely at the clinic. 'I don't want to be there right now,' he thought and decided against seeking out his friend. Who else was there? Drey, of course, but what would Kaj say to him? Hey, as if you couldn't already tell, I've fought with my parents again, right after you asked me not to, so I'm here to...talk? Do nothing? Train? Drey probably would jump at the chance for more training, but Kaj was worried that he might end up taking out his angers on the boy and actually hurt him. That would be the perfect ending to this hellish day, wouldn't it? 'My sister's going to die (don't think that!!), my parents are mad at me, and now I've hurt the one person who seems to still care about my well-being in spite of how rude I've been today. Absolutely beautiful.' He almost laughed aloud at the absurdity of his own thoughts, and as he reached the other end of the village, he simply turned and began following the path that would take him completely around Burniver.

So basically, you have nowhere to go.

That sounds about right.

Burniver was by no means a big place; if one kept a good pace, one could walk completely around the village in no more than twenty minutes. Kaj had almost come full-circle when he saw someone sitting against a tree a little ways ahead of him. As he drew nearer, he recognized Dah Rin, one knee drawn up against his chest and his arms wrapped loosely around the leg. The blond was chewing on a few strands of his hair. Continuing to walk forward, Kaj drew up to his friend's side and paused, waiting for Dah Rin to look up at him, the light threads slipping from his mouth as he nodded.

"Hey."

Kaj nodded back. "Hey," he returned, and sat down, leaning against the tree next to Dah Rin. "So, why aren't you at the clinic with Maekyl?"

There was almost nothing, just a slight tightening of Dah Rin's shoulders and a quiet intake of breath, but Kaj had taught himself to look for things like that, and he remained silent, allowing Dah Rin to speak on his own. "Ah...I didn't really think that she would want me there," came the reply.

Like hell I'm going to believe that.

Right?

Kaj sighed. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately. But it wasn't his place to pry into another's business. "Okay."

More silence. The wind was persistent as it pulled at Kaj's hair, and he suddenly thought he knew one of the reasons that Dah Rin kept his own hair back. A low rumble rolled through the air; a storm was on its way.

Then, "Kaj?"

"Hmm?"

"You went there, to the clinic," Dah Rin said softly. When Kaj agreed, he continued. "Do you know what happened?"

"I..."

Wait! You're not supposed to tell anyone!

Kaj glanced to his side at Dah Rin, at the way the older boy seemed to curl in on himself, strangely vulnerable. 'I don't have the right to keep this from him.' "Yeah, I do." Keeping his eyes fixed on the swaying branches above his head, he repeated what he knew, and his tone was calm. He purposely left out the part about his little sister most likely never being able to recover. It would probably become public knowledge before too long anyway.

When Kaj trailed off with, "And he's speaking with the town elder right now..." Dah Rin stared at him, eyes wide, and gave a low whistle. "Miasma inside Burniver? But what about the crystal?"

"I don't know," Kaj replied, his shoulders rising and falling slowly as he shrugged. "Perhaps the last caravan didn't bring back enough myrrh to completely replenish it, or maybe something happened to the myrrh itself; it could have been deluded or something like that."

"But if that's what it is...what happens if the crystal continues to fade? Burniver would be swallowed by the miasma, and the people here...." Dah Rin stopped then, unable to voice his concerns. A worried frown tugged at his brow, and he began to absentmindedly chew at his hair again.

"We'd either have to leave and find a new place to live, or stay and die where we are." Straight to the point, as always. Kaj shook his head. "If the crystal dies, so do our homes."

"If the crystal dies..." Dah Rin echoed, still grimacing, his pale grey eyes narrowed in sudden thought. Then abruptly, he leapt to his feet, nearly cracking his head on a low-hanging branch in his haste. "That could be...!" He turned quickly to face Kaj as the younger boy got to his feet, confusion sliding across Kaj's features. "Kaj, go talk to Seamhen again; find out everything you can about this problem. He probably has some theories. And if you see Maekyl still at the clinic, just ask her to come by my house. Can you do that?" Kaj nodded hesitantly, and Dah Rin continued. "Thank you, and after that, you have to find time to stop over as well. It's...it could be very important."

Important?

Sounds like he has a plan.

Kaj nodded again, more firmly this time. "Alright," he agreed. It's not like he really even had anything else to do tonight. "I'll be over soon, then." With a small wave of his hand, he turned back to the worn path.

"Kaj, wait!" Dah Rin called after him suddenly. Kaj stopped and looked back.

"Yes?"

"Um, you never mentioned, how Ciel is..."

Kaj didn't answer at first; he just stared at Dah Rin, his eyes almost blank. Then, "She is not expected to recover." Don't show that it hurts. Don't show that it's breaking you apart.

If Kaj's cold voice surprised Dah Rin at all, he didn't show it; instead he reached out and gripped the younger boy's shoulder. His face was sad; not pitying, Kaj could've lashed out at pity. "If you need _anything,_" he said strongly, though his words were quiet. "All you need is to ask, okay? Know that."

If it had been the time, Kaj would've smiled. "Thanks," he answered, and then pulled away, walking back to the clinic.

**BREAK.**

Perhaps he should just have never returned to the clinic. Perhaps he should just have walked home instead. Perhaps he should just have apologized to his parents and joined them in mourning for the nearly dead. Instead he allowed his feet to carry him to the doorsteps of the small white building, allowed them to carry him forward in search of the Yuke, even when he had no true idea of what he was looking for. All the same, he inevitably found himself at a door with the number seven painted above it, and he reached out, pushing the door open and continuing in.

This isn't what you're supposed to be doing.

You're –supposed- to find Seamhen.

Must you defy –everyone-?

And then Kaj was staring down at his sister, his eyes empty. He didn't move when Seamhen came in after him and shut the door quietly. Maybe he hadn't heard right away. After a moment, though, he sat down heavily in a chair at the bedside and rested his chin in his hand, the elbow propped up on his knee. "I'm back, aren't I," Kaj said resignedly. His shoulders were slumped. "I don't even know why. I was supposed to find you, and I ended up here again." His head fell back, and his eyes slid over to where the doctor stood near the wall. "How did it go?"

Seamhen shrugged, just barely. Readjusting his helmet, he answered, "As well as could be expected, given the news that I had to drop at his feet." A pause. "At first he would not believe that miasma was actually finding its way into this place, so I...I showed him the two people that had been affected by it so far."

Kaj's hand dropped suddenly, moving out to grasp at Ciel's limp fingers possessively. "You showed him evidence," he said bluntly.

"I showed him reality. He needed to realize that normal people were being hurt because of this. Surely you understand how serious this situation is?"

"...I do." This time it was Kaj who stopped for a minute. Then, "What's happening, Seamhen? How could this...?" 'I don't even know what I'm asking.'

"It's so strange," the Yuke answered softly. "The crystal is failing. Five months since the last caravan returned, and it bears the fatigue of at least a year without replenishment. That should not be happening." Kaj could hear the confusion in his tone. "The only choice of action at the moment seems to be to gather another batch of myrrh and hope that it was an isolated incident, perhaps an innocent mistake on the part of last year's group."

"So you suggest another caravan."

"I don't know what else to think. Teryl Loh will call a town meeting tomorrow to inform everyone of what has been going on, and to discuss possibilities..." Seamhen trailed off as a hushed whimper came from the bed. Ciel's brow had drawn together in a frown and her mouth had fallen open slightly. Kaj shifted forward off the chair and to his knees in an instant, leaning closer to his sister.

"Ciel!" he said anxiously, holding the girl's hand carefully between both of his.

"A...ah...." The broken sounds seemed to echo in the small room. Ciel's eyes began to open once and then fell shut again. "Kaj...?" she said weakly, her words rasping from her throat. Her eyes opened again, more fully this time. But she was staring emptily at the ceiling above her. She blinked a few times, and her eyes started to swivel frantically from side to side. Searching.

"Kaj, where are you? I can't see you...everything is so dark..."

Kaj had frozen where he kneeled, his hands still clutching at Ciel's fingers. "I'm here," he answered quietly. But his own eyes were wide in shock as Ciel turned towards him, no sign of recognition appearing on her face. "Right here."

"But, I can't see you! Where!" Ciel's other arm lifted, trembling, and she reached over towards Kaj's voice, her palm outstretched. Then her body convulsed, and both of her arms snapped down to clench in the sheets; her teeth bit into her lower lip only to be forced open as a bout of coughing tore through her.

Seamhen began to walk towards the bed, his steps rushed and tense. Kaj backed away from his sister, stumbling to his feet as he struggled to keep his breathing steady. "She was talking," he cried. "And then...What's happening to her! Why can't she see?!"

There was no answer; the Yuke simply held his hands over Ciel's form, concentrating. A green whorl began to glow around his feet, and then it slid beneath the bed, spiraling up around the girl. Almost instantly, Ciel's violent coughing slowed, and then ceased altogether, and she collapsed back against the bed, silent again. Before Kaj could speak, Seamhen stepped back and shook his head, glancing over at the boy. "I can do nothing but ease her suffering this little bit. I...nothing more. And there will no doubt be more victims, all beyond my help. First children and the elderly, and then even the healthy adults."

"Stop it."

"It is the truth."

"You don't know that! Not for sure!"

"It is the truth as it will be within weeks, then. Is it any more acceptable now?"

Kaj's head jerked up suddenly, a strange determination flashing in his eyes. "It will not be that way." And he walked forward briskly, about to push past Seamhen when the Yuke put a feathery hand on his shoulder. Kaj paused, tense; he could pull away if he so wanted. "You would tell my parents of my decision?" he asked, still looking at the door in front of him.

Seamhen shook his head slowly. "No," he replied without hesitation. "I would warn you to be cautious. All is not as it should be. You must realize this."

A simple nod was Kaj's answer. Then, "Thank you for all that you have done for her. I know that she...but please..."

"I will continue to do all that I can, do not doubt that."

"I never did."

And then Kaj was gone, walking into the hallway, and then out through the main doors towards Dah Rin's house.

He now had something to ask of him.

**END.**

Ah, I'm sorry if it doesn't seem to be going anywhere...it is, but it's just turning out to take a lot longer to get there than I had originally planned. I had at first had the events of last chapter, this chapter, and some of the next one ideally going to be written into only one chapter, but it turned out too long, so I decided to cut it into two. And it's still so long! I feel horrible; I've seriously been trying to keep things concise, but it doesn't seem to be working. I think my muses want me to make the characters as solid as possible. I don't know if I'm pulling it off, but I hope so.

But anyway, there's the second chapter. Problems, praise, suggestions, I'll take it all. Please leave a review, you writers all know how good they feel! And hugs to those who have already reviewed me; you're wonderful! Ja!


	4. The Hole is Deeper than We Thought

Notes: Hello all! Welcome to the third chapter. Apologies for the long wait for this update. I'm glad that people seem to like this, even if it is long. Believe it or not, things actually start moving this chapter! Of course, that also means that this is where we begin to leave the original story in the game. I hope you like where this goes, please tell me what you think!

Chapter Three: The Hole is Deeper Than We Thought

--Recommended Listening: 'Mint' by Olivia--

**START.**

It had begun to rain when Kaj stepped out of the clinic.

It wasn't raining –hard-, just a steady drizzle of water. Persistent, and cold. The clouds had finally covered Burniver, and the last of the sunset was hidden from view. In effect, night had already come.

Kaj pounded on Dah Rin's door a few times, and then stood back to wait for his friend to let him in. Dah Rin lived alone; as far as Kaj knew, Dah Rin's mother hadn't even come with him when he and his father had moved to Burniver. Kaj didn't blame him for not talking about it very much. Everyone had their own problems; they didn't need anyone else's.

Then the door opened, swinging back quietly, and Dah Rin was staring at him. His light hair had been tied back neater this time; the ends were looped and tied back up on themselves so they didn't hang so far down his back. "Hey," Dah Rin said in greeting, stepping out of the way to allow Kaj room to walk in. "Glad you showed up."

With a nod, Kaj took the invitation and stepped through the doorway, dropping his sandals off to the side. Then he followed Dah Rin out of the hall and into the main room of the small house. He glanced over the few chairs and the couch that were scattered across the wooden floor, but didn't sit down. Instead, he began to speak. "You said earlier," he began; so quiet it must have been difficult for the other to hear him. "That if I needed anything, that all I would have to do is ask."

Dah Rin tilted his head to one side a little. His long bangs tried to slide across his face, but he hooked them behind one ear. "I did," he agreed. "I meant it. What do you need?"

'How can I ask this of him?'

'It's too much...'

"I...Seamhen said the crystal is failing, as if it's been a year since the last caravan returned with myrrh." He faltered for a moment, and then spun around quickly to face Dah Rin, his hands almost clenching at his sides. "Start another caravan! You have to; I'm not old enough yet!" And suddenly, Kaj found he couldn't stop talking, that all his feelings were compressing themselves into words and pouring out of him in a ceaseless stream "Seamhen says it's the only thing he can think of; he says at this rate, more people are going to be infected. Teryl Loh is going to call a meeting tomorrow to bring this matter up to everyone else, but no one knows how long the crystal will last! It could be completely dead in a matter of weeks, or less. It's pointless for me to stay here; I can't do anything! My parents want to move anyway. I need to get out. I can't stand this!" 'What am I saying?! Stop!' "You said all I needed to do was ask if I needed anything, and I need –this-!" Kaj stopped abruptly, nearly biting his tongue as he snapped his mouth shut. What was wrong with him today? He never used to blurt things out like that. It was too unsettling.

For what seemed to Kaj like the longest while, Dah Rin was silent; his head still canted slightly, his eyes thoughtful. Then a grin pulled up the corners of his mouth, and he stepped forward, dropping his hands onto Kaj's shoulder. "Do you have any idea how perfect that is?" he said finally, a triumphant tone in his voice.

Comprehension began to spark in Kaj's mind, and his eyes widened. "You...you said it could be very important You were already considering a caravan?"

Dah Rin grinned again. "Exactly." Then he grew serious once more, and his smile disappeared. "There's no way I'm going to just sit back and watch as people I've grown up around die like that. Absolutely not. And you're right; I'm old enough to be in a caravan, so I might as well take advantage of that." His grin was back, a bit more sinister this time. "Do you really think I would wait for the town to make a collective decision? I don't doubt they would agree a caravan is the best choice, but in the time they would take...like you said, we don't know how long we have. Maekyl already said she would come along, can I assume that you'll be joining us as well?"

There was a sudden light knocking off to one side, and Kaj and Dah Rin turned. Maekyl was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, gently rapping her knuckles against the wood. "Dinner's ready," she said quietly, and then smiled at the younger boy. "Hello, Kaj." There was a pause, and Maekyl's eyes dropped to the floor, the dark green hidden for a second before she looked back to her friend, whose long, blue hair was so much like her own. "How are you holding up?"

At least she didn't say that she was sorry.

She's smarter than that.

'So she'll know if I lie.'

"I'll be fine," Kaj answered, just as softly. And he would be, eventually. If Ciel somehow, miraculously got better.

"...Okay, then. If you're sure."

'You know I'm not.'

The sudden push of a hand against his back urged Kaj from his musings and he stumbled forward a step until he caught his balance. Dah Rin walked past him, smiling still, and tossed a glance back at him over his shoulder. "Don't worry, Kaj can handle anything the world throws at him. Except, maybe, an empty stomach?" There was a slight slide of his hair as he inclined his head towards the kitchen. "Come on, then. We can't leave all of this wonderful food that Maekyl made just for us go to waste, now can we?" Coming up to the woman's side, he dropped an arm around her shoulders and pressed his lips against her temple. "Thanks, hon'," he said gratefully, and then continued on to the small wooden table.

Maekyl blushed a little, ducking her head. "Ah...it was nothing," she said quickly. "Besides, how can we plan anything without eating first?" And she, too, walked over to the table, pulling out a chair and sitting down in front of a bowl of soup.

Kaj hesitated for a moment in the doorway to the kitchen, in that instant unsure of whether or not he should sit down as well. But then Dah Rin lifted his hand, gesturing the younger boy over. "Come on, Kaj, her cooking isn't -that- bad."

Trust Dah Rin to always lighten the mood.

With a small laugh, Kaj joined his friends for dinner.

**BREAK.**

For the next several hours, Dah Rin, Maekyl, and Kaj planned out the night.

Dah Rin finally stopped his pacing of the room long enough to put his hands over the table, lean forward slightly, and look from Maekyl to Kaj. "Now Kaj, you need to get a hold of the caravan's chalice. -Make sure- that it has a crystal shard with it." A lop-sided smile. "I know, I know, you won't forget. Just making sure." He looked back to Maekyl. "And you take care of the supplies; food, blankets, simple stuff like that. If we need anything else we can probably pick it up along the way." When she nodded, Dah Rin stepped back again. "Great. And I'll take care of getting the caravan itself to the northern edge of town. Okay? So make sure you're all there by..." He paused, and stared briefly at the small wooden clock hanging on the wall. "An hour or so, I think that'll be enough. Is that good?"

"Sure," Kaj agreed, and pushed himself to his feet. "I'll be there." He made to pick up his bowl when Maekyl scooped it away from him, shaking her head once.

"I'll take care of it," she said. Then to Dah Rin, "That's fine. Food and blankets; no problem."

Dah Rin nodded. "Good. And remember..." His eyes slid to Kaj for an instant, and then away. "Don't mention this to anyone; I don't think they would directly object, but we might end up being delayed."

'Which means, I can't say goodbye to Drey.'

'He'll be disappointed, I think.'

'I promised to train with him tomorrow.'

With a succinct, "I'll see you later, then," Kaj left the house.

**BREAK.**

An hour or so came and went at its usual sluggish summer pace, and the three finally gathered at the edge of town. It was quickly decided that Dah Rin would drive for the night; two years ago he had been a member of a caravan, along with Kaj's father, so he knew more about the layout of the land around them than either of the other Selkies. And when Maekyl yawned, even though she tried (unsuccessfully) to cover it with her hand, Kaj claimed the first watch, ignoring the half-hearted objections as he helped to load the blankets and the few boxes of food into the wagon. Then everything was ready; Dah Rin had taken his place in the front, Maekyl sat behind him, already beginning to doze off.

And Kaj found himself hesitating.

'Like this...I can't...'

"Ah...wait, I'll be right back," Kaj said suddenly, turning back to Burniver. His sandals almost slid in the fresh mud from the recent rains. "Five minutes." He walked away.

Maekyl and Dah Rin stared after him for a moment, and then Dah Rin sighed good-naturedly and leaned back against the wooden frame. He laughed softly. "Hopeless."

**BREAK.**

'I didn't expect this.'

Liar.

'I'll just leave.'

Coward.

'What can I do?'

Guess.

'I hate this sometimes.'

I'm sure.

If you think you can run away, you're wrong.

'Don't tell me what I think.'

'And I don't run away.'

And so Kaj found himself at the edge of Burniver's small graveyard, protected by its own crystal so it could be visited at any time. Like now, for example. Again, Kaj had come almost by habit; every night he tried to pay respect to his godparents. But that wasn't even what he had been debating about. The problem (nice choice of words) was the person who was kneeling in front of those two graves. 'I wanted to avoid this...I think.'

He visits every night as well; most likely because –you- do.

Don't lie, even to yourself.

Kaj walked forward, his shoulders slumped a little in defeat, and he kneeled down beside Drey, ignoring the cool slick of the mud around his knees. Bowing his head, he offered up a swift prayer to his godparents' spirits, and then began to get back to his feet. Maybe he could get out of there without having to actually –speak- with Drey. He almost laughed. 'That had to have been the stupidest thing I've ever thought.'

He was right. As he stood, Drey turned slightly to look up at him, his eyes unreadable in the night. "You're leaving?" he asked quietly, even his tone neutral.

Kaj froze, half-standing, then after a moment he pulled himself up straight. He met Drey's gaze, both questioning and defying. How did you guess, and are you going to try to stop me?

Drey dropped his eyes first, and when he spoke again, his voice seemed less sturdy, less sure. "I...I didn't think that you would have wanted to stay here and do nothing." Then his head snapped up again, as if he had just thought of something. "But I didn't tell anyone else, I promise! I wouldn't. In fact..."

'Oh.'

'-That's- why.'

"...I though that I could go with you," Drey continued. "That's why I came here. I knew you always came by, and I thought that I could try to convince you." Drey stood up as well. "So..." His feet shifted, and he stared down at them. "What do you think?"

"Drey, I don't think..." Kaj began uncertainly.

Drey broke in quickly. "Do you honestly think that I'll be leaving anything important behind?" he shot back.

'Unlike you' was left unspoken.

He's got you now.

**BREAK.**

"It's been eight minutes; you're lucky we didn't leave without you," Dah Rin accused in mock seriousness when Kaj and Drey arrived back at the caravan. Raising one eyebrow at the younger boy, he continued. "You've caught us another rebel, then? We're leaving the poor town nigh deserted."

Kaj flicked a glare at his blond-haired (and laughing) friend before coming around to the side of the wagon and clambering up onto the top, where he would keep his watch.

Drey had shaken his head, pressing one hand to the side of his head to hold the bandanna in place, and a worried look had come over his face. "No! I came along because I wanted to! Kaj didn't ask me to!"

Maekyl chuckled then, and moved to the back of the wagon, beckoning Drey over and helping him to clamber inside. "Aya Noh will be upset, you leaving without a word like this." Another gentle laugh as a blush spread across Drey's cheeks. Dah Rin whistled suggestively from the front, and the youngest Selkie flushed harder. "Ignore him," Maekyl said with a sigh. "He jokes too much."

"You know me, darling. Anything for a laugh."

With a sound of annoyance, Maekyl threw a small blanket at the older Selkie, smiling at his surprised squawk when the piece of cloth landed around his head. Drey snickered, ignoring the doleful look on Dah Rin's face. Kaj just stared tiredly up at the dark sky above him. Everyone was being altogether too cheerful for such circumstances as these. Beneath him, Dah Rin was stating valiantly that 'they were all against him', and suddenly, "Hold on!" and they were off, the wagon creaking softly as it began to move forward. Burniver disappeared into the night behind them, and before too long, even the pale blue glow of the village's crystal had faded away.

**BREAK.**

After an hour or so had passed, Dah Rin called up to Kaj. "So, why'd the kid say he wanted to come along?"

Kaj was silent for a moment, and then he shrugged in the night. "He asked me if I thought there was anything he was leaving behind."

"Ah."

"He's too young for this."

"Probably."

"...I didn't ask him to come, you know."

**BREAK.**

Morning revealed the small Selkie caravan creeping slowly along a worn road, winding its way through the trees. One Selkie sat at the front, holding the papaopamus' reins limply one hand while the other toyed idly with the purple strap binding his long, tawny hair that hung over his shoulder. Another one lay on the wagon's top, staring up with his arms folded behind his head and his pale blue hair falling off to the side. A young woman, her own hair much like the one above her, slept inside, her head pillowed on the blond's back. And beside her, curled up in a thin blanket, was a young boy, his short, pastel-green hair rumpled in spite of (or due to) the blue bandanna threatening to become permanently entangled in the strands.

Finally, the wagon drew to a halt. Dah Rin let the reins fall from his hand and extended his arms above his head with a sigh. "Well, what do you think, Kaj? Is this a good a time as any to break for breakfast?"

Kaj sat up and stretched as well, pulling his fingers through his hair once. "It's fine with me," he answered, then moved to the edge of the wagon and dropped to the ground. "Where are we now?"

"Probably about half a day from the nearest myrrh tree, if I remember right," Dah Rin said, looking over his shoulder at Maekyl, who was still sleeping against his back. He half turned and reached out to brush her hair out of her face, then gently shook her shoulder. "Hey there," he said when her green eyes blinked a few times tiredly and looked up at him. "Time to get up."

Maekyl nodded as well as she could and leaned back, suddenly grimacing and putting a hand to her back. "Sore," she muttered, and then scowled at Dah Rin. "Sorry, but you really don't make a good pillow."

The blond put his hand to chest theatrically, a look of pain playing across his features. "Ah, you wound me, fair maiden. I've been told I make a –wonderful- pillow."

A cerulean eyebrow arched delicately and Maekyl glanced appraisingly at the other Selkie. "Really? And who said that?" She softened her words, though, with a quick kiss on Dah Rin's cheek, and then she began to move towards the open back of the wagon, swatting gently at Drey's still-sleeping form. "Come on, Drey. It's time for breakfast."

A muffled groan was the only answer, and Drey curled himself tighter in the blanket. With an irritated sigh, Kaj glared at the lump. "At least you –got- sleep, kid, unlike some of us. Now get up or I'll pull you out myself."

"'m up...a sec..." came the nearly incoherent and singularly unpromising response.

Kaj's eye threatened to start twitching. "Fine," he said after a moment. "I warned you." With that, he reached out and grabbed one of Drey's ankles, proceeding to haul the whole mess towards him.

At Kaj's touch, Drey's body flinched violently, and his leg ripped from the older boy's grip. Kaj had to step back quickly to avoid being struck, but he bit back the sharp response that was ready on his tongue when Drey sat up quickly, still tangled in the blanket. "Kaj?" Drey asked suddenly, looking genuinely confused, and he gave a small start when his bandana slid down over one of his eyes. Then his gaze seemed to find Kaj, and he took in the puzzled look on the older Selkie's face. A smile tried to work its way onto Drey's mouth, though with little success, and he set one hand on the back of his head sheepishly. "I...uh..." he began, struggling for something to say.

"What's wrong?" Kaj questioned sharply. He had come back forward a step, and his forehead was slightly creased in a frown.

"Of course!" Drey answered quickly, turning away to begin to disentangle himself from the blanket that seemed to have coiled itself rather tightly around his legs. "Why wouldn't..." His hand went slack for a moment, and Kaj thought that his eyes had become slightly unfocused. Then, "Breakfast!"

The sudden outburst caught Kaj off guard, and he blinked as Drey somehow, regardless of the cloth impediment, scrambled over to the edge of the wagon, heaving himself out, again surprising Kaj when he landed on his feet. Any shadow that might have been on the younger one's face was obliterated with a sudden smile. "Come on! Maekyl makes the best food." And he was off, bending one leg back at the knee as he hopped towards Dah Rin and Maekyl, plucking at the blanket around his foot.

'Well, he has good balance, at least.'

...Drey's foot caught on an exposed root and he pitched forward, arms flailing in a useless (and undignified) attempt to keep upright...

'Never mind.'

Kaj moved forward quickly, slipping one arm around Drey's waist and using his other hand to hold onto the boy's arm as he effortlessly pulled him back onto his feet. "Hold still," he ordered, and kneeled, deftly unwrapping the sheet from around Drey's leg. "It's a wonder you haven't broken your neck already," he muttered, but his tone was soft, and vaguely humored. Then he stood, holding the offending fabric in one hand. "Well?" he prompted, looking from where Dah Rin was setting up a pile of wood for a small fire, back to Drey. "I thought you were all excited about breakfast."

Drey grinned up at the Kaj, before grabbing the older one's wrist and pulling him along towards the other Selkies. "Of course I am! And you are too! That's right, I can tell. You might –act- cold hearted sometimes, but you're realmff..." His voice was abruptly silenced as Kaj wrapped the blanket in his free hand around Drey's head.

"I'm really a nice person? Sure." Kaj walked on ahead of the muffled boy when Drey let go of him long enough to pull a fold of the cloth away from his eyes, and Drey ran after him.

"Nnnn...Kaj, that..."

"Was mean?"

"...."

"Predictable."

"But it was!"

The rest of breakfast passed much in that same uneventful manner; though there was an incident in which Dah Rin dozed off too close to the fire and the fur around his wrist caught a spark, promptly bursting into flame. Ten minutes of cursing and complaining later, Dah Rin had been convinced that he was too tired to continue driving. Kaj had volunteered to take the reins for a while, Maekyl had clambered to the perch on top of the wagon, and Drey had seated himself in the back, dangling his legs over the edge and humming a lively tune. The caravan jolted to a start, and continued along the old and worn road, leaving a trail of stirred up dust in its wake.

After an hour or so, Drey had tired of watching what they were leaving behind and crawled up to the front where Kaj sat. "Hey," he said, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, and his chin resting on his hands. "Anything interesting up here?"

Kaj shrugged. "Not especially. Besides, you see everything from where you were sitting before anyway."

Drey pouted. "But it's not the same!"

"Yes, I suppose that boulder –would- be much less intriguing from the back," Kaj replied dryly.

With an exasperated sigh, Drey leaned back against the wooden frame. "Where are we going, anyway?"

"River Belle Path," came the answer, from somewhere above him. Drey glanced up and saw Maekyl's head hanging over the edge of the top. "We'll be there in a few hours, I think." She grinned. "And then you'll have all the excitement you need. I'm guessing you've never seen a goblin before, have you?"

Drey frowned, and didn't answer for a moment, staring past Maekyl at the cloudless sky. Then he shook his head, slowly. "No, I haven't."

Another grin, and a sharp laugh. "Well, keep your eyes open when we get there." Her words turned bitter. "You'll have your fill of them soon enough."

"Really? Kaj, have you ever seen a goblin?" Drey asked, leaning forward again to look at the older boy. When he didn't get an answer, he reached over and poked Kaj in the shoulder. "Kaj?"

Kaj twitched slightly, and his head snapped up from where it had begun to sink towards his chest. "Ah...what?" he responded weakly, blinking his eyes several times.

Suppressing a chuckle Drey poked at Kaj again. "You were falling asleep," he said bluntly.

Kaj decided enot to answer, instead glaring at the road ahead of them.

"If you're getting tired," Maekyl said suddenly from her place above them, "you should let me drive and get some sleep. I know where we're headed, I won't get lost. And you're going to need to concentrate when we get to the Path anyway."

For a few seconds Kaj didn't respond, and Drey began to wonder if he had drifted off again. But then he nodded, slowly, and pulled on the reins to bring the papaopamus to a halt. "Alright," he said finally, and moved past Drey into the back to sit down against the side, pulling one of his legs up and wrapping his arms around the knee. He tossed a glance at Maekyl, who had already settled in on the front bench, as if he had just remembered something. "Alright, but who are you going to have on watch?"

"Drey's more than capable of telling me what's coming," Maekyl answered.

"...Are you sure?"

Drey bristled.

The blue-haired girl laughed softly, and then raised her hands in a soothing gesture when Drey opened his mouth to no doubt deliver a scathing remark. "I'm sure, I'm sure. He'll do fine. Now go to sleep. I need you two to be conscious when we get there."

"...Alright..."

**BREAK.**

Another hour had crept by when Maekyl finally spoke up, looking for a second at Drey sitting on the bench beside her. "Why'd you come along?"

"Eh?" Drey said, a little caught off guard at the sudden question. "Um..." And then for a long while he was quiet, his brow furrowed in thought. Finally, "I'm...not really sure, I think I mean, I –do- have a reason, it's just...not really obvious to me right now."

"Ah."

"What about you? Was it for Aya Noh?"

Maekyl frowned slightly at the mention of her sister's name, looking almost pained for an instant. Then she smiled. "Yeah, sort of. I didn't want this type of thing to happen to her again, you know?" When Drey nodded, she paused for a moment, and then continued. "But it was also for Dah Rin. It shook him up pretty bad also, what happened to Aya Noh and Ciel. He wanted to do something, and I wanted to help him. Especially when he had wanted so badly to be at their sides in the clinic, but after his father..." Her voice cut off, and she glanced at Drey apprehensively.

But Drey just nodded. "I know. He told me a while ago." He still remembered that time, barely a year after he had woken up in that same clinic, when Dah Rin had caught him on his way back to the hotel.

'Drey! Wait a second!'

'Yeah?'

'I...I wanted to apologize. Everyone else visited you when you were in the clinic. I should've come by...'

He had smiled. 'That's okay. You don't like that place, do you?"

'Ah...no. Not really."

'Why don't you like it there?' He had been so young, and hadn't yet learned to notice when people didn't want to talk about something. He was ashamed of it, now.

Dah Rin had just stared at him for the longest while. Then, 'Because my dad died in there.'

'Oh.'

'....'

'I don't have a dad.'

Drey still winced when he thought back on that conversation. Even though he had been no more than a child, it still seemed cold, all his questioning. He pulled his thoughts back to the present, and reran what Maekyl had said to him through his mind. "So you left your home and your family for Dah Rin?" Another soft smile and a nod were his answers. "You really like him, don't you?"

Maekyl blushed and ducked her head just a little. "Yeah."

"...What's that like? To care...that much for someone else?"

There was another silence as Maekyl sat up straight and stared at Drey, a curious look sliding across her face and floating in her eyes.

And Drey in turn stared at the road in front of them, suddenly finding it intensely fascinating.

"Well," Maekyl said, turning back to the front, and Drey could feel the weight of her gaze move from him. "I'm...I don't think I'll be able to explain it very well. It's not exactly something meant for deciphering, you know? But..." She paused and seemed to attempt to gather her thoughts. "You know how it's been said that when you find the one you love, everything will be perfect, right? Well, it's not exactly like that, I don't think. Like, if someone close to me...died, then it would still hurt. But when there's someone else with you, then it's that small bit easier to stand. Because you can give up some of your feelings to that person, and they can feel it with you. It's so strange, really, if you think about it too much."

She trailed off; her lips were still somewhat parted with that almost bemused expression on her face. Then she laughed. "That didn't make much sense, did it?"

Drey shook his head absently, his gaze still locked on the worn trail disappearing beneath their feet. "No, I guess not..."

Maekyl smirked suddenly. "And why did you need to know? Is there somebody you were thinking about in particular?" Her voice was lighthearted again.

The boy shook his head again; more forcefully this time, and his face seemed a little redder. It could have been just the light. "No, that's not it! I just wanted to know what it was supposed to feel like so I would know if...I ever do end up feeling that way...what it was." He crossed his arms over his chest defensively, his defiant attitude ruined only by the pout that scrunched up his mouth. Maekyl had a sudden urge to pinch his cheek.

Restraining herself with more than a little difficulty, she continued, serious again. "Alright, but keep in mind that this is only how –I- feel; people feel love in different ways. Don't use me as a guideline, okay?"

"Alright."

**BREAK.**

The sun had only just reached the middle of the sky, letting fall it's harsh, noonday light, when the caravan came upon a fork in their road leading off to the right. Looking that way, Maekyl and Drey saw trees rising above the grassy hills, and further along, the blue glimmer of a river winding its way among them.

The River Belle Path.

Pulling the reins to one side, Maekyl directed the wagon off to the side of the road. She hopped off, motioning for Drey to do the same and warning him to be quiet. "Let's let them sleep for a bit longer," she whispered. "We'll wake them when lunch is ready."

And so they prepared for lunch. Drey wandered a little ways among the few trees along the sides of the road, in search of dead branches for their fire. Maekyl carefully dug around in the back of the wagon and finally pulled out the small bundle of fish they had brought along. It wouldn't last long, so it would do well for their first day. After that, they could just buy fresh meat. Maekyl spread a blanket out on the ground to the side of the road and looked up in time to see another wagon coming towards them. She frowned and walked a few steps forward. The other wagon was coming from the River Belle Path.

After a moment, the wagon drew up alongside their own and stopped. Three Yukes dismounted, and one walked up to Maekyl and inclined his head. "Greetings, traveler," he intoned. "Where do you hail from?"

Maekyl bowed her head as well. "We come from Burniver. I presume you are from Shella?"

The Yuke nodded. "Yes, we travel from Shella in search of myrrh." He watched Maekyl frown at that and continued. "I realize that we are several months ahead of schedule, but there is a dire emergency in our city. The crystal had begun to weaken earlier than was projected, and by the time this was noticed, there had already been several...fatalities." His head tipped slightly to one side. "But if I am not mistaken, your caravan has also begun early."

"Yes," Maekyl agreed softly, and her thoughts were growing jumbled disoriented, tinged with a chilling realization. "Our crystal also has started fading sooner than we expected. Several...two children were affected." She looked carefully at the Yuke. "What do you think is the cause of this?"

For a moment, the Yuke didn't reply. He simply returned her stare from behind his thick mask, unmoving. Then, "I expect that it had simply been a poor year for the myrrh trees. There have been records of such things happening in the past."

"I see," Maekyl answered, not entirely convinced. But it made sense, she thought. Myrrh trees, like any other plant, could have a bad year. She decided to think more on it later. Perhaps Dah Rin would have something to say. "We just stopped to have lunch. Would you like to join us?"

The Yuke shook his head. "I am grateful for your offer, but we must continue on." He bowed again. "I will pray for your successful journey." Turning back to their wagon, the three Yukes climbed back on.

Suddenly, Maekyl thought of something, and she cried out. "Wait!" When the Yukes looked back at her, she continued. "So you just came from the Path's tree?"

Again, there came no answer for some time, and then the Yuke that had spoken with her nodded. "Yes, we came from the River Belle Path. But the myrrh tree there was already dry." And with a snap of the reins from the driver, the wagon rolled off down the road.

Maekyl stared after them for a moment, before she heard a sound behind her and turned around. Drey stood there, a confused look on his face. "Maekyl?" he asked, walking forward. "What did they mean when they said the Path's tree was dry? Wasn't that the one –we- were going to?"

"I...I'm sure they..." Maekyl began shakily, and then she found that she couldn't come up with anything to say to that. She looked down at the ground. "I don't know," she answered. "Maybe...ah, let's just start lunch. We can tell Dah Rin and Kaj about it later and decide what to do."

Drey nodded, set down his pile of sticks, and moved to help Maekyl get the food prepared, but he could feel the anxiety coming off of her like something tangible, and it made him worry.

Something was very wrong.

**END.**

Again, I'm going to apologize for the time between updates. I mostly had this done pretty quickly, but I put of doing the end when I got distracted when school started. It's only been a few months, and I already haven't done the only two big projects in Chemistry we were assigned. That bodes well for the rest of the year, I see.

Anyway, I'll try to get the next chapter up sooner this time. I'm back into the story now, and after listening to a new album the other day, the muses have been slapping me around to get things written. So far, I have this story planned out for at least eleven or twelve years, and it's separated into four parts as of now. I can only hope to stick with it long enough to get through that far. I really want to, but it's hard to stay focused on one thing sometimes. I'm sure that you writers know what I mean.

Thanks for all the feedback! Believe it or not, it really helps to keep me on track. I've printed out your reviews and taped them into my notebook, so whenever I open it, I see what you wrote, and it reminds me to keep working. So please leave a review, I love you for it. You're wonderful!


	5. Journal Entry: Day One

Journal Entry

Day: One

Record Entered By: Kaj Inej

**START.**

Firstly, I would like to make it clear that I was not consulted in the decision on who should keep the records. If I had been, I most certainly would have chosen someone else. Dah Rin, for example. He _is_ the technical leader of this caravan. Shouldn't _he_ be the one with this responsibility? Of course he should. And yet I'm still the one here.

Typical.

There isn't even a necessity for a record at this point. It's the first day of this journey, and nothing of interest has happened. There. Entry complete. How this will aid future travelers eludes me.

Of course, this isn't exactly a standard caravan trip. I've been on several before; there's a tentative amount of time that we have had to make it back in. Now, it's just move as quickly as possible. First the Path, then maybe the Mines up north. Perhaps Luda as well. I know people in Luda. Extended family and such.

Family.

It's a strange word. There're too many definitions of it. I think that everyone should decide on just one meaning of 'family' and stick with it already. For example, family could just be people related by blood or a similar tie. Ciel is family; she's my sister, related by blood.

But Drey is family as well, which is where 'family' changes from one thing to another. See where it gets a bit confusing? Although, Drey's situation _is_ a bit different, I suppose. My parents liked his parents, and that's all that was needed. Gods, but I wish I could tell him sometimes. I don't know how I would do it, though, and I think that it's that, more than anything else about it, that keeps me from saying anything. I mean, how would you go about something like that? You just…don't.

The boy's just too damn cheerful about everything. It doesn't feel right. He's worrying everybody, apparently.

And this is why I should not have been the one to keep the records. There were a total of three sentences that were relevant in this entire thing. I think next time I'll just make Dah Rin write it.

**END.**


End file.
